Crooked Little Vein

Burned out private detective and self styled shit magnet Michael McGill needed a wake up call to jump start his dead career What he got was a virtual cattle prod to the crotch, in the form of an impossible assignment delivered directly from the president s heroin addict chief of staff It seems the Constitution of the United States has some skeletons in its closet the Founding Fathers doubted that the document would be able to stave off human nature indefinitely, so they devised a backup Constitution to deploy at the first sign of crisis In the government s eyes, that time is now, as America is overgrown with perverts who spend time surfing the Web for fetish porn than they do reading a newspaper They want to use this Secret Constitution to drive the country back to a time when civility, God, and mom s homemade apple pie were all that mattered.The only problem is, no one can seem to find it.So who better to track it down than a private dick who s so down and out that he s coming up the other side, a shamus whose only skill is stumbling into every depraved situation imaginable With no lead to speak of, and no knowledge of the underground world in which the Constitution has traveled, McGill embarks on a cross country odyssey of America s darkest, dankest underbelly Along the way, his white bread sensibilities are treated to a smorgasbord of depravity that runs the gamut of human imagination The filth mounts it is clear that this isn t the kind of life, liberty, or happiness that Thomas Jefferson thought Americans would enjoy in the twenty first century.But what McGill learns as he closes in on the real Constitution is that freedom takes many forms, the most important of which may be the fight against the good old days Like Vonnegut, Orwell, and Huxley before him, Warren Ellis deftly exposes the hypocrisy of the moral majority by giving us a glimpse at the monstrous outcome that their overzealous policies would achieve. New Download [ Crooked Little Vein ] Author [ Warren Ellis ] For Kindle ePUB or eBook – kino-fada.fr Faint hearts and the offendable might just want to sit this one out the book, mind you, not this review Acclaimed comics writer Warren Ellis cranks up the ick factor to about 11 and delivers a hysterical noir, mystery travelogue through the oddest, most depraved nooks and crannies of the American psyche It is dark, twisted and no holds barredand it is also very, VERY funny To give you a sample of the agenda items Ellis uses in his carnival of oddballities, you will will find A group o Faint hearts and the offendable might just want to sit this one out the book, mind you, not this review Acclaimed comics writer Warren Ellis cranks up the ick factor to about 11 and delivers a hysterical noir, mystery travelogue through the oddest, most depraved nooks and crannies of the American psyche It is dark, twisted and no holds barredand it is also very, VERY funny To give you a sample of the agenda items Ellis uses in his carnival of oddballities, you will will find A group of Godzilla bukakke fetishistsyep, you read that correctlyA cohort of Bodybuilders who inject large quantities of warm saline in their berries yeah, it s kinda like that It s also kinda like.AHHHHHHHH A tantric Ostrich orgy A massively depraved uber richdude who orally milks dead cowsgo ontake a minute and let that sink in An image sensitive serial killer who murders conservatively dressed woman a nice twist there this guy is a hoot A steak...and shit and shitting and porn and godzilla and bukkake and godzilla bukkake and saline injected testicles and shit and rats and dirt and grubby porn theatres and shit and tantric ostrich sex and date rape drugs and tantric ostrich sex via date rape drugs and shit and shitting and and and and and forgive me, it s all a little tiring.this is a bizarro private detective novel concerning a missing alternate version of the U.S constitution, filtered through sleazy grindhouse movies and William S B and shit and shitting and porn and godzilla and bukkake and godzilla bukkake and saline injected testicles and shit and rats and dirt and grubby porn theatres and s...Wow, was this book disappointing What should have been Ellis s introduction to the print world became a collection of hey guys look at this crazy shit I found on the internet and posted on my blog already, strung together by...Well, this is just all kinds of messed up..Mike McGill is a private detective with bizarre luck that has him constantly getting mixed up in things he d rather not know about like guys who have sex with ostriches The creepy and corrupt White House chief of staff wants to use Mike s tendency to be a shit magnet to help him track down a book that contains the Secret Constitution of the United States that the administration will use to stop all the weirdness that has been going on since Nixon ga Well, this is just all kinds of messed up..Mike McGill is a private detective with bizarre luck that has him constantly getting mixed up in things he d rather not know about like guys who have sex with ostriches The creepy and corrupt White House chief of staff wants to use Mike s tendency to be a shit magnet to help him track down a book that contains the Secret Constitution of the United States that the administration will use to stop all the weirdness that has been going on since Nixon gave the book to a Chinese prostitute.Mike isn t happy about the job, but the money is too good to pass up Soon he meets Trix, a free spirited and sexually adventurous young woman who agrees to help him find the book, but Mike will be confronted with everything from groups of people masturbating to Godzill...Mike McGill is a self professed shit magnet and as an independent private investigator, he s brought some bizzare work by some even stranger clientele However, nothing holds a candle to the job he s been hired for by the president s heroin addicted chief of staff Tasked with tracking down a secret second constitution, Mike is about to push his sanity to its absolute breaking point to a place he may never return from If watching a copy of Godzilla spliced with audio from a porno seems like you Mike McGill is a self professed shit magnet and as an independent private investigator, he s brought some bizzare work by some even stranger clientele However, nothing holds a candle to the job he s been hired for by the president s heroin addicted chief of staff Tasked with tracking down a secret second constitution, Mike is about to push his sanity to its absolute breaking point to a place he may never return from If watching a copy of Godzilla spliced with audio from a porno seems like your thing, then this book may be for you.If injecting saline into your testicles with a group of spray tanned body builders sounds like a good time, then this book may be for you.If milking a cow using your mouth sounds like a refreshing way to quench your thirst, then this book may be for you.Enough of the tire...Rating 3.5 of fiveThe Book Report How bad can a day get Mike McGill can tell you, and he d be right But he doesn t know exactly how bad a day can be until the White House Chief of Staff bear in mind the book came out in 2007, adjust your mental compass, and go from there walks into his office with a deal he can t refuse.Hey, after waking up naked in your office chair with a rat pissing in your coffee mug, why would anyone refuse any deal So Mike gets a half million dollars in expense mo Rating 3.5 of fiveThe Book Report How bad can a day get Mike McGill can tell you, and he d be right But he doesn t know exactly how bad a day can be until the White House Chief of Staff bear in mind the book came out in 2007, adjust your mental compass, and go from there walks into his office with a deal he can t refuse.Hey, after waking up naked in your office chair with a rat pissing in your coffee mug, why would anyone refuse any deal So Mike gets a half million dollars in expense money, a handheld computer that hinges open nothing ages worse than hi tech , a phone number to call in case of emergency 555 555 5555, we invented that, son, and gave it to Hollywood, but it really works for us , and some new clothes, and starts following cold leads i...Warren Ellis reads the Internet, and if I didn t read the Internet I could learn a lot about the perverse side of society by reading this book Unfortunately, I do read the Internet, so it s not really news And then there s the point at which a bunch of people tell t...Rarely do I pay attention to cover blurbs on books However, one of the blurbs on the back cover of this book reads Warren Ellis writes like a bipolar Raymond Chandler Wow, count me inOne of my friends refers to books like this as literary Skittles which means that it is a really fun read that contains little to no literary edification.Mike McGill is a down on his luck, small time private eye who gets roped into searching for a lost copy of the US Constitution The Macguffin is in fact Rarely do I pay attention to cover blurbs on books However, one of the blurbs on the back cover of this book reads Warren Ellis writes like a bipolar Raymond Chandler Wow, count me inOne of my friends refers to books like this as literary Skittles which means that it is a really fun read that contains little to no literary edification.Mike McGill is a down on his luck, small time private eye who gets roped into searching for a lost copy of the US Constitution The Macguffin is in fact a secret copy of a second constitution that few have read, and the powers that be want it back Along the way he gets involved in much weirdness and sex The sex varies from the kind that makes you smile to the kind that makes you cringe I m tempted to google a couple of thepeculiar fetishes described in this book, but i m not sure how I would feel if it turned out that real people are truly engaged in these activities The absur...Down and out detective Michael McGill gets hired by a shady government type to find the Constituition The real Constituition McGill s case takes him deeper and deeper into a bizarre subculture of sex and drugs Can he find the Constituition AND maintain his sanity I bought this in an airport a few years ago and devoured it on a three hour flight I was a big fan of Ellis s after reading the Transmetropolitan comic for a couple years and wanted to see what he could do with a novel.Ellis surpris Down and out detective Michael McGill gets hired by a shady government type to find the Constituition The real Cons...Boy, where do I start with this one First off, let me warn those who find certain fetishes, or sexual behaviors, to be weird or disturbing, that this novel may bother you greatly However, it also may change how you view weird sexuality It s not that this book is only about sex It s not It s just mostly about sex What people find pleasurable in a sexual context varies wildly here We see everything from Godzilla porn, to saline injections into the testicles and labia, to STD Russian roul Boy, where do I start with this one First off, let me warn those who find certain fetishes, or sexual behaviors, to be weird or disturbing, that this novel may bother you greatly However, it also may change how you view weird sexuality It s not that this book is only about sex It s not It s just mostly about sex What people find pleasurable in a sexual context varies wildly here We see everything from Godzilla porn, to saline injections into the testicles and labia, to STD Russian roulette,...

Crooked Little Vein
  • English
  • 19 August 2017
  • Hardcover
  • 288 pages
  • 0060723939
  • Warren Ellis
  • Crooked Little Vein